How to Prep for Sex Again After Cumminf
Despite increasing pop culture coverage, anal sexual activity is still heavily stigmatized. Later all, the old adage goes that guys are into it because it's "tighter" than your vagina and they've seen it in porn, and women will occasionally acquiesce equally a bargaining scrap or save it for special occasions just. While this might be true for some women, assuming it goes for all women is completely unfair. A lot of women try anal non for any dude, merely because they're into it themselves! Here, five women who have actually had anal sexual activity explicate their motives, how they prep, and whether or not it'south actually always gotten them off.
Probably the No. 1 thing everyone wants to know is ... does it hurt?
Adult female A: It honestly does injure, be prepared, and use lots of lube if you desire an easier fourth dimension. The beginning fourth dimension I tried it was with an ex, he said "don't worry if we're in the shower information technology's merely like lube" *center roll* that is absolutely false, employ lube.
Woman B: At times, it can exist uncomfortable, just I don't recall that it ever actually hurt. I've had partners who are very circumspect and listen to my needs, and then I've never experienced pain. There are times, however, when a larger penis may crusade cramping.
Woman C: For me, information technology did. That outset time was like, "Oh dear god, nothing is supposed to go in there." You actually have to relax. Like a lot of deep breathing and you lot have to permit everything go. Then it kinda stops hurting when you finally relax, but for me, information technology can get bad once more when he starts thrusting. I read that putting in a plug during foreplay helps a lot, but I've never used i.
Adult female D: Yes! If it didn't, this wouldn't be a topic of chat.
Woman Due east: It definitely hurt the outset few times. Now? Information technology doesn't hurt at all and mostly feels skillful.
Why do it?
Woman A: From my experience it is more most the pleasance of the male than the female. For the guy, information technology is tighter hole — non to be crude — for the female person it hits dissimilar parts than regular sexual activity and can experience skilful when washed correct.
Adult female B: For me, anal play intensifies my orgasm. The get-go toy I tried was anal chaplet, and I was surprised how much pulling them out at the point of climax made the orgasm and so much stronger! It is the aforementioned for me with plugs or a existent, live, human penis. The orgasms I have when anal stimulation is involved are simply and then much more intense than other orgasms.
Woman C: I decided to try it because I'd heard it can exist actually pleasant and some girls can orgasm from information technology. Information technology's also actually taboo and naughty, and I'm one of those girls who likes that. And then I thought I'd give it a shot.
Adult female D: I usually only exercise it when boozer and if trying to impress the lucky dude I'm with.
Woman East: Knowing that information technology'southward kind of taboo in a way makes information technology a huge turn on. And having sex when you lot're super turned on (instead of similar, routine post-date nighttime sex) is manner more satisfying overall. In my experience, anal is never the main event. It's more like afterplay, or fifty-fifty the big finale. It'southward usually for just five minutes subsequently we've been having intercourse for a while (20–30 minutes.) Afterwards anal intercourse, sex is officially over considering if I accept an orgasm, in that location's no way I tin continue. That's how skilful anal sex is!
Who wanted to practice information technology more — you or your partner?
Adult female A: The guy, my ex definitely wanted to do information technology more. In fact, I got to his flat that was decorated in candles after being gone for a few weeks. My 'exciting surprise' was anal.
Woman B: Information technology was a boyfriend who initially talked me into trying information technology. At present, I ask for it well-nigh as much as my married man does.
Adult female C: Me. I had heard that some girls dear it, so I wanted to try it. The guy I'm with is not really into it, which is part of the reason I've simply done information technology 3 times.
Woman D: Him. When it happens, information technology's because I've conceded. Depends on how much I'thousand into him ... and afterward, I kind of feel like he "owes me something."
Woman E: I've done information technology with a few guys and it'due south always been a mutual desire.
What does it feel similar the first time?
Adult female A: The first time hurt. Utilise a lot of lube. I could feel my donkey being stretched and information technology was extremely unpleasant.
Woman B: I imagine it could be painful with a lover who is non very considerate, or if you are uncomfortable voicing what you need. For me, nosotros went very dull the beginning time and let me get adapted to the new sensations. Once I was comfortable, however, I was begging him to speed upwards and go harder.
Adult female C: It'south weird. It feels tight and non pleasant. It feels like a muscle cramp. Like you're trying to open up a muscle and stretch it out and it doesn't want to listen. That'southward what it feels like at first. I didn't like information technology. And then y'all relax and information technology feels a little improve.
Woman D: At first, extremely unpleasant. Kinda feels like a penis going in your anus.
Woman E: The commencement time it feels like an uncomfortable medical procedure.
What does information technology feel similar over fourth dimension?
Woman A: It does get better over fourth dimension, I think a huge part of the problem is that relaxing is actually hard and you end up clenching up your body, including your barrel. This only makes it worse, considering well there is a dick going in there.
Woman B: I don't take to get-go equally slowly anymore, usually, unless it has been a very long time. Nosotros incorporate anal play into our sex activity life on a regular basis, commonly. It is really my favorite porn to watch when I'm masturbating. The act itself and the thought of the act both turn me on.
Adult female C: Information technology feels like you're full and it's super-intense.
Adult female D: Over time, you accommodate. Similar to vaginal intercourse, I suppose.
Adult female East: Over time, you know what to expect and how to enjoy it. It likewise hurts less because you're not every bit tense and nervous (if you lot liked it the first time, that is!)
Does it ever experience good?
Woman A: It does feel good after a while, only exist relaxed, use lots of lube, and I think it works all-time when it is coupled with clitoral stimulation.
Adult female B: Oh, god, yes! I wouldn't go along doing it if it didn't!
Woman C: I know some girls who dear it ... [but] it's i of those things that definitely takes more than one try to encounter if you like it.
Woman D: It never really feels skilful. Just becomes more tolerable, I suppose. It too depends on the size of his manhood.
Adult female E: Yes! Anal sex feels bang-up when y'all're with someone who lets YOU be in command of the speed and force, if that makes sense. Plus yous have to combine with vaginal or clitoral stimulation for it to feel really good.
Do you feel similar getting a wax back in that location is "expected"?
Woman A: Maybe, if his mouth is going anywhere near at that place, probably!
Adult female B: I'g in a long term relationship, then we actually help each other groom a bit. I would think if you wax elsewhere, you'd want to wax there as well. I've had it done before and it feels about the same as the other areas covered in a Brazilian.
Woman C: I don't think you have to get waxed. In the beginning of my human relationship, I'd get Brazilians, but now I rarely wax for him. And so I wasn't waxed. [Just] it might the daughter feel more comfortable if she is waxed, if she worries nearly that stuff.
Adult female D: No, a wax isn't required ... I suppose whatever dude who'south into anal wouldn't be then detail equally to request a shine entryway.
Woman East: I don't recall it'south expected, honestly. If a guy is doing anal with you lot, he probably doesn't care about a little bit of natural body hair dorsum in that location.
On boilerplate, how presently in the human relationship — if information technology's a dating scenario — do you think it generally happens?
Adult female A: For me, it was nearly 6 months into our relationship. We had a kinky relationship every bit it is, so I'k non sure what'southward normal.
Woman B: True story – the human who is now my husband and I went there on the very first night, but that is highly unusual for me! It but felt right with him, for reasons that are now, I guess, obvious, since we've been together for over 7 years. I would say commonly as soon as y'all are comfortable actually talking about sexual practice. Even if you 'clean upward' earlier y'all play anally, there are still times it gets messy unexpectedly then yous should exist at a bespeak in your relationship where that would not be an issue.
Woman C: Nosotros had been together for 7 months earlier we did it. Only I know girls who do it when they outset claw upwards with a guy. But those are the girls who beloved it.
Adult female D: Hmm ... in my experience, if he's into it, you lot know soon into the relationship. This type of "fetish" isn't easily curtained, in my opinion.
Woman E: At to the lowest degree six months to a year in, when you lot've already explored the more general sexual activities thoroughly and feel comfy with each other to get even more intimate.
How much lube? What brands are best?
Adult female A: Not certain how much exactly, merely soap it on…
Adult female B: I really like silicone lubes, like Pjur or Uberlube. Recently my hubby has suggested nosotros endeavor some thicker, more gluey lubes for him (yes, he likes anal, too!) and then we will exist trying out some new ones this weekend. Planning a run to the adult store tomorrow.
Woman C: Lots of lube! Like, lube on me and lube on him. I couldn't even imagine doing it without lube.
Woman D: Lots. Any kind. Fifty-fifty saliva if nothing else is available.
Woman E: Lube is tricky because you don't know if it will experience okay until y'all try it. The first time I used lube during anal sex (I call up it was KY) I really felt an uncomfortable tingling sensation when the anal intercourse started that wore off somewhen, but information technology wasn't very pleasant. I'one thousand not a lube expert but nosotros've at present been using Wet Platinum Premium Silicone and it'south perfect for the occasion.
Exercise you bleed?
Woman A: I didn't bleed but I did experience stretching, I had to brand him cease a few times the first fourth dimension because I was scared pare was going to rip.
Woman B: Occasionally, but never much. There is a slight risk of violent around the anus if you lot like things fast and difficult, equally I do.
Woman C: I didn't drain (well, at least not that I know of). But I feel like it's totally possible, peculiarly if the guy forces it or y'all don't use lube (blench).
Woman D: Not that I retrieve.
Woman East: Nope! No bleeding.
Do y'all spread a towel on the bed or anything?
Adult female A: Yeah, I would recommend spreading a towel on the bed because there is e'er a possibility for a mess.
Adult female B: Yes, usually. Skillful for excess lube and in instance it gets a little messy.
Woman C: I'chiliad non actually certain why you lot would? I feel like information technology isn't more than messy than normal sex.
Woman D: Canvass stains are a adventure and should be considered collateral damage.
Woman Due east: Nope, no towel either. Unless you're using the unabridged bottle of lube (probably not recommended) anal sex isn't any messier than vaginal sex in my experience.
Is in that location a large cleanup later?
Adult female A: Many times that I have done it accept been in the shower so no clean up. I haven't had problems with carrion or blood, just semen so whatsoever cleanup you would need for sexual practice.
Woman B: Not really. I would say don't engage in anal if you experience similar you may need a bowel motion presently as that would increase the risk it will be messy. Near of the time, information technology is not at all. If it is, a quick leap in the shower is all that is needed.
Woman C: I don't think there'southward a big cleanup. Particularly if you have a condom. Just slip it off and that's all the cleanup nosotros needed.
Woman D: [Not unless you lot had] Chipotle [beforehand].
Adult female E: Not in my feel! For me, it's something that only lasts five minutes. You have to listen to your body.
Are in that location useful things re: angles that we should know?
Woman A: I think doggy fashion with clitoral stimulation works well, or him spooning yous from behind, intimate and sensual.
Woman B: It'due south all nigh what is comfortable for you. I prefer to exist on my knees or breadbasket, but you might like a different angle. I think on my knees is a dandy way for the receiver to command the speed, as long every bit their partner isn't someone who is going to grab and force information technology in.
Woman C: I did it doggy way the first time and so I did it with him sitting on a couch (I was on top with my back to his breast sitting on him). The 2nd is definitely improve. And co-ordinate to two gay guys I know, the correct way to do it is to accept the daughter on tiptop and she can ease herself down and become at her own pace, and once that happens you tin flip yourself over then he'due south on top now and then y'all can do whatever you desire. Merely the virtually important is for the girl to go at her own pace.
Woman D: I think doggy fashion is virtually conducive.
Woman E: Yep! Doggy fashion is the easiest to get-go with. I've tried other positions but found doggy to be the best 1.
Condoms however, obviously, right?
Woman A: I would for the first few times. Afterward that, it depends on the relationship y'all have with the person you are doing it with.
Woman B: Oh, yep, unless you and your partner equally exclusive and trust each other implicitly. At that place is but every bit much of a chance of contracting merely virtually any STI there is, peculiarly for the receiver.
Woman C: Totally to the condoms.
Woman D: Even more so!
Woman East: Yes, always, no matter what.
Have you ever had an orgasm from anal sex activity lone?
Woman A: No, I have not!
Adult female B: Yep and no. I commonly use a vibrator on my clitoris along with anal penetration, but non always. And then I usually cum during anal sex but with that additional clitoral stimulation. The times I've had anal sexual practice without a vibrator, I've had a quite different sensation that what I typically think of equally an orgasm, but information technology is very pleasurable. Perhaps information technology is a different type of orgasm? I'1000 merely non sure.
Woman C: No, but I've heard it'southward possible.
Woman D: Nope, but then once more, I've never had one from vaginal penetration solitary.
Woman Due east: No. My #1 tip for pleasurable anal sex is to exercise it doggy style, and while your man is thrusting away (slowly at first!) apply your manus to stimulate your clitoris. If you lot can bring yourself to orgasm this way during anal sexual practice, you'll see why people similar it and so much.
This post was originally published in 2014 and has been updated.
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